I know
That's why I stare at code almost every single day, I've taken apart more add ons/apps than I care to admit. I've dabbled in PowerShell, Lua, C++, (I am NOT listing HTML, but php, css, hell even ActionScript etc)
And only for php, mysql, bash scripts and Kylix (which is delphi -> Object Pascal) did I get some training back at school, and I flunked it all. Turns out I hate being told "You can't do this". My repo owns his now!
No seriously, you learn nothing by giving up, sure - it won't all be pretty and awesome code. But, have you looked at your first sites? I still want to slash my eyes out for it. (I made a navigation image that turned all text upside down on hover)